Parenting is no easy job. Raising children may be the most rewarding adventure in the world, but no parent would argue that it isn’t a difficult journey, fraught with challenges along the way. And of course there is no recipe for good parenting, no roadmap to guaranteed parenting success. At the same time, moms and dads can avoid many common pitfalls, by not falling prey to the many common myths about parenting, myths which do far more harm than good when given credit.
One popular misconception about parenting is that there’s a right way and a wrong way to do it. People who believe they know everything about parenting will tell you immediately when they see a “bad” mom or dad in action. The funny thing is, these self-appointed experts never seem to agree on the details. Sometimes the bad parent is too lenient, sometimes too strict. Moms and dads get criticized for not being sufficiently involved, and at the same time for being too clingy.
The truth is, of course, that nobody knows everything there is to know about parenting. It doesn’t matter how many books a person has read. It doesn’t matter how many healthy, well-adjusted, successful children the person has raised. What works for one family will not work for every family. There is no universal truth about parenting, no complete formula for parenting success. Every parent has to fumble along the way, making the best decisions and trying as hard as he or she can. So don’t let anyone ever pass judgment on your parenting choices.
Another common myth about parenting is the belief that parents have to be perfect. Now we’ve already established clearly that there is no correct or right way to raise a child, so it naturally follows that a parent can’t be perfect nor imperfect. Still, a widespread conviction about parenting persists; people can’t shake the notion that if they make a single mistake, they will ruin their children’s lives!
In reality, no parent is perfect. We make the choices that seem best to us, based on what we believe, what we value, and what we know about our own kids. Sometimes, those choices don’t turn out the way we hoped. Sometimes, we make mistakes. The thing to remember about parenting is that it’s not scientific. There is room for error. Not only do parents learn from their own missteps, but their children learn as well. Because in the end, the real truth about parenting is that it’s a growing process for the parents and the children together. It is a journey, and not a destination.
Fill your home with love and let your children know that you will always support them and keep the same. Then, don’t sweat the details. That’s the only truth anyone really needs to know about parenting.
